Things I hate: 1

Hello and welcome to what I'm hoping will become a regular (perhaps weekly if I can hate enough things) part of this blog. It's my new segment, "Things I hate." I'm doing it because I promised Orion I would post my enemies list (which is being worked on currently) and a list of things I hate, but I thought this would be a better way to do it. Today on Things I hate, internet fights.

Internet Fights:
We've all seen them somewhere or another, somebody just has to get it off their chest that since someone doesn't agree with their point of view, that person must be gay. I know this is only one scenario, but I feel that I can create the best examples if I use it as an example.

Say, for instance, someone gets on the thread and says something like "Lol wow everyone on this thread is so gay." Refer back to this later.

Now the proper way to respond to this is to use a witty comeback or NOT AT ALL (something many people need to learn). If the witty comeback is used quickly, it can end the fight and people can avoid looking like complete morons, but since nobody that posts on threads is ever witty, you get the most annoying things ever, the three types of hate responses. These drive me crazy because they are present in every thread I have ever seen a fight started in and the people that employ any of these tactics always come out looking like total douchebags. Here are the three types:

The anger approach:
This one tends to make the user look the stupidest of the three tactics, but sadly, this one is used the most frequently because as I said earlier, most people that post on meaningless threads are more useless than paragons. (I know those weren't my exact words, but I like to insult these people). Refer back to the example above. A typical anger approach to that statement would be something along the lines of "Your a moron and I hope you get hit by a car." They are almost always grammatically incorrect in some way and of course, they pack about as much of a punch as a baby with a pillow on its hand. Because of the fact that the people using this tactic look so stupid to everyone, I am the least bothered by it. They have suffered [almost] enough.

The smart-ass approach:
This one is far more annoying than the last approach because the people that use this think that they are better than everyone else on the thread because they possess a language filter in their brains. Unfortunately for them, they don't posses the "getting involved in internet fights is stupid" filter as well. People using this tactic would tend to comeback to the insult by saying something along the lines of "I resent you using the word "gay" in a derogatory sense. Some people in the world are actually homosexuals and take offense to this word being used as a synonym for stupid and on top of that, many people that throw the word around carelessly tend to be covering for their own latent homosexuality." If you made it to the end of that long winded comment, I congratulate you because I usually give up reading by halfway. The people using this tactic resort to facts that are rarely proven and try to hide their inadequate arguing skills by using big words. Way to use Thesaurus.com, dumbasses!

The budding psychologist approach:
Not quite as annoying as the last one, but still very annoying is the budding psychologist approach. The people that use this approach slap on their fake PhD's in human psychology and feel that it is their duty to inform everyone involved in the thread that "This person obviously has some issues in their past that causes them to feed off of other people's anger, so please do not feed them by continuing to post on this post." The only redeeming quality of this approach is they actually try to break up the fight, which is a good alternative to getting involved and looking like an idiot. The only problem is that this approach usually comes with an insult hidden within itself. While they try to break up the fight, people using this approach will still have to psychologically profile the other person and they usually wind up calling them a nutcase.

How can you avoid pissing me off by getting involved in internet fights? It's simple, say something amazingly funny to shut the guy up or shut the hell up. If you have nothing witty to say, don't say anything and maybe people will take your example.

That concludes this week's segment. Please leave a comment if you thought it was good at all or leave any feedback. My intent is to point out things I hate in a humorous manner, so any suggestions on ways I can improve the quality of these posts is greatly appreciated. Peace out.